Wednesday, February 25, 2009


Sorry no pictures so far. Should have some by the end of the week.

Miss Talicee and I are on the road to recovery. I still have the lingering cough,but not like it was. She has a rash,that is healing, around her eye. We think this was because of the virus that we have had.

Last Tuesday, I had my yearly mamogram. When I left, the nurse said everything looks good,we will send you a letter when read by the Dr. No problem. Went on about my day. The weekend came and of course it was busy. Monday came. I was on the phone most of the day working on after prom stuff. I happened to look at my cell phone and I had a voice message. I thought it was old. So put in password so that I could delete it. No it was not old. It must have come in when I was on the phone. It was the Dr. office. I needed to call immediately about my mamogram. Ok, mind in gear with all kinds of stupid stuff.

Well, when I called they were closed for lunch. Ok,wait another hour. Called right at 1:00. The nurse began to tell me that I needed to have a rescreening. No problem. Have done this before. But she went on. There is a large mass in your right breast. What, I don't feel anything. Then she kept on telling me more and more. By then my mind was mush and I was not hearing anything that but you have cancer. The nurse got me in right away on Tuesday,which is not ususally the case. So all Monday I cried, prayed, cried, prayed and gave myself a headache.

So, I laid down to try and get rid of the headache. Big mistake. Miss Talicee had already had her nap and was laying with me on the bed. She loves to get the brushes and combs and play with my hair. So while I was laying there, she played with my hair. I must have dosed off, because I woke to the sound of scissors cutting hair. Yes, she cut my hair. Not only had I gotten bad news, now do I have a bald spot in the back of my head. Luckly, it was nothing major. Guess where all scissors are now. IN THE TRASH. Geshee, can she not leave scissors alone. I did not need this today.

Tuesday, Randy and I dropped Miss Talicee off at preschool and heading to the Dr. office. I did not speak, cry or anything. I think I was just numb. They took me back really quick. Mind is in overdrive. The nurse did a another mamogram. This time it was a digital one. I could see each picture she was taking. She showed me where the problem was. WHEN SHE DID THE FIRST PICTURE, THERE WAS NOT MASS. She talked about what they had seen at first. I had the orginial mamogram where, yes they smush your breast. When they did that, it pushed the tissue together in my breast making it look like I had a mass. The digital one showed nothing. I even saw nothing. But to be on the safe side, they did a ultra sound. I got to watch this one too. My right breast has 10 cysts in it. THEY ARE NOT CANCEROUS. They are about as big as the thickness of your fingernail. They are all centered in one place. So when they did the first mamogram, it compressed these into one large mass. The left side has 3 cysts. Age, weight and diet has a lot to do with it. When I go back in a year, they may be gone.

So all that said, I do not have breast cancer. I had in my mind planned out my funeral, my will, what I would tell my children. I know it sounds stupid, but I was just no sure what was happening. I am an organized person, so I guess I was starting early.

I am cancer free. I do not have to go for another mamogram until next year unless I feel something. I want to thank God for answering my prayers. Thanks for all of my praying friends. Prayer does work. I am just so thankful to be here for a little while longer.

Sorry to be so depressing, but I have never had a scare like this one. Even Miss Talicee's seizure did not scare me this much.

1 comment:

Becky said...

Sometimes it is nice to be able to vent either anger or sadness. It is great news to hear that cancer is not the outcome. How scary that must have been. I am glad that it is nothing more than cysts. Hugs to you,for all the yucky stuff you have dealt with lately!

Here's hoping the package coming your way will make you smile.